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Nigerian Men…The Good, The Bad, The Ugly!

Bold, brash, infuriating, funny, crafty, big-hearted, double-dealing, sexy, crazy, loving…take your pick! All these adjectives (and more) describe the quintessential Nigerian man. A lot has been said about him…some good, some not so good. There’s the belief that Nigerian mothers raise their daughters and spoil their sons…too true. From the time he comes screaming from her into the world and all rejoice that “it’s a boy! ” he is doted and waited on hand and foot by the female folk in the family…whether mothers, sisters, aunties and their girlfriends/wives are expected to pick up from there. How many a little girl have had to wash dishes and when asked if Junior can join her, have been told “No! Because he is a boy!” How many a heart has been broken by those brown, twinkly eyes and wicked, dimpled grin? The countless “I’m sorry, I’ll never do it again” to the “It wasn’t my fault, she tricked me…into getting her pregnant!” Nigerian men are as different as they come but there are some characteristics that stand out, are constant and trail him wherever he goes.

HE IS HARDWORKING…Compared to his counterparts in Diaspora, the Nigerian man is a natural hustler. Whether its at his fancy bank job in V.I. or watch-peddling in the Traffic, he works hard for his money. Not for him the queuing at the Giro office or sitting on the sidewalk, swigging from a bottle of booze, hollering at sistas. Even if he does that you can be sure he has finished work and is just kidding around, which brings me to the next characteristic…

HE PLAYS HARD….what’s all that hard work for if you don’t get to spend the proceeds? He LURVES to groove…whether its at the Club or the open air pepper soup joint at Obalende! He loves to enjoy himself …and invite others to enjoy it with him. There’s always some house-warming, Child Dedication, Birthday or new item to “wash” which leads me to the fact that…

Image result for handsome men from nigeria

HE LOVES THE GOOD THINGS OF LIFE…just drive through Lagos or any of the other major cities in Nigeria and check out the flashy cars, fancy homes and hot night spots. The Nigerian man (along with his woman) likes to enjoy the good things of life. He’s got to have the flashiest car, the finest girl, the biggest house. If he’s got the dough, he flaunts it (and wants you to know he is flaunting it too!) and God help those of other Nationalities when he is on the roll! On the downside, this has led many into a life of crime.

Another characteristic of the Nigerian man is that HIS LOVE FOR WOMEN! That the Nigerian man loves women can not be disputed. No race, colour or hue is off limits. Not too many years ago, the winner of Miss Norway Beauty Contest was a half-caste with the distinctively Nigerian name of my forebears. When asked about her origins, she said her mother was Norwegian but unfortunately she had never met her father before. Talk about sowing your wild oats! I’ve seen children that are half-Filipino and half-Nigerian! Half-Malaysian and even half-Indian! How he managed to convince the latter I will never know because Indians hardly ever marry outside their race! But trust my Bros! No woman is too hard to toast! Once he makes up his mind, he goes after her with a single-mindedness of a soldier on a special mission. Who can resist his charms?Which brings me to the next characteristic…

HIS “SWEET MOUTH”! How many times have you my sisters, sworn that you were going to “brain” that boyfriend of yours when you catch him in yet another escapade, only for him to turn up with an innocent-looking face, weaving his fabricated story of how he tripped and fell on his Aunt who happened to be wearing red lipstick, so that’s how the mark got on his shirt! You know he’s lying and sweet-talking you but you allow yourself (after initially raking) to soften and smile at his smooth flattery and corny jokes.E.g. “Mamarazzy-mamazita!The only woman wey fit turn Urhobo man to flying boat!No one but you!Every other woman is a counterfeit!” and you accept him, after all, you are too young to die of hypertension!This leads to yet another characteristic…


There is no denying it…Nigerian men are fine. Compare him to men from other nationalities. Is it the “yellow” ones from the East or the Caramel ones from the West? Or the dark chocolate from the North? Sure, there are some that are more “fearfully than wonderfully made” but generally our boys are fine!

And last but not the least…



That his woman should know how to cook should not even be up for negotiation. Recently, I was at a get together in Abuja for a group of African–Americans that had completed a project and were on their way back to the U.S. They were going on about how warm and hospitable the people were and the women among them (like true Americans!) said they wouldn’t mind getting married to Nigerians and would like to be hooked up! Well, a crazy colleague of mine decide to take on the role of match-maker and started asking for their likes, preferences etc. As they were giving it one by one amidst much laughter, one of them dropped the bombshell that she couldn’t cook.You could have heard a pin drop! The whole room went quiet. That, I can tell you, put paid to her “Nigerian-husband” ambition.

Overall, the Nigerian man may have his flaws (who doesn’t?) but love him or hate him, he is who he is…and if the truth be told many of us Nigerian women wouldn’t have him any other way…save for a little tweaking here and there!


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